Slip Slidin' Away

So, here we are in a second post, with more typing into the abyss. It’s ok. I wanted to see how a 2nd Post looks in the layout, and I’m likely realizing in real-time that my “making a blog as a test for someone else’s site” reasoning was probably a cover (albeit a true one), but a cover nonetheless… for me wanting to put something down on paper (screen).

Of late, I’ve found myself needing to write. I think I quit writing my thoughts down back around 2012 or so (a total guesstimate), mostly because nobody needed to hear me at the time. Nobody wanted to either, and rightfully so. I wasn’t in a great place. I had moved houses several times between 2009 and 2012, and there was more to come. A move to Nashville uprooted my life even more than usual, and I felt extremely alien for a few years (I mean, honestly I felt alien for about 10 years).

Jump ahead a bit (2 more moves and several attempts at post-divorce relationships) and social media (Facebook + blogs mostly) had run their course for me. I had let out way too much personal baggage into the world (lesson learned?). And the elections of 2016 and 2020 really slowed down my desire to be online. I eventually quit Facebook, and started to dial back the other sharing. I was weary of reading family and friends post about politics, and I was certainly weary of myself getting angrier and angrier at the lightbox in front of me. That 2016 election really hurt in more ways than many of us will probably realize for years to come.

Thanks, Trump.

Mamiya 6 / Kodak Portra / Greensboro, NC / 2011 (?)

Sooooo, what in the world am I getting at? With an eventual move looming in the unknown but certain future (a good thing) I have started going through boxes to prepare and cull the hoard. I got rid of most of my crap on the last big move (back to Nashville for a 2nd time). When I say got rid of, what I mean is that I BURNED it all in a backyard fire. I probably let go of too much, but it felt right at the time.

Anyhow, I found all of my old film negatives and slides. I am slowllllly going through them with an attempt to organize, something I never did in the first place, regretfully. I’m trying to take a second look at what I was shooting, and maybe why. Second passes through film, with a bit of distance between, is always enlightening. You find things you hated at the time to be ok. And so I will be posting shots here. Why not? The above is not one of those 2nd guesses, but one I rather liked at the time. It graces the cover of a NC Poetry Anthology as well (via Texas A&M University Press) .

The point here is this: I’m posting a personal blog on a site that virtually nobody visits. For a reason. There will be no SEO, post-optimization, sharing, etc… just me writing into the abyss. For good or ill. For documentation or for therapy. Whatever. If you find it and read it, I apologize. Look away.

-cmp